Okubalulekile kuqala wukutshala ukuthi ubudlelwano obujwayelekile bunjani ngoba emibhangqwaneni eminingi awazi kahle. Nokho, ukungabaza kuvela ezimweni eziningi zempilo, mayelana nokuthi yini evamile "Ingabe ngiya kude kakhulu? Ingabe ngikwenza kahle? Ingabe lokho engikucabangayo, yilokho engikufunayo ...?" Ukungabaza namaphutha okuziphatha akwenzeki kuphela ebudlelwaneni nasekuhlalisaneni, kodwa nasezingeni lomuntu ngamunye empilweni yethu yansuku zonke. Ungangitsheli ukuthi ezikhathini eziningi empilweni yakho, ikakhulukazi uma unokuzwela okuthile (okubandayo lutho, ukhathazeke zero), awuzange ungabaze ngaphakathi ngesinqumo, umbono ... ukuthi uzothatha, ucabanga ukuthi yini abanye abangayenza empilweni yakho.
Kodwa kumbhangqwana, engazi kahle ukuthi yini evamile, okulungile, okuncane, kungasenza seqe imingcele yokuziphatha futhi/noma sivume ukuthi baweqa nathi, sibahlanganise, futhi lokhu kuhlobana kuzokwenziwa ngaphezu kwakho konke, ngoba izizathu ezimbili, noma ngenxa yalokho engikushoyo, yokungayazi kahle imikhawulo yesimo esijwayelekile (“Angazi kahle ukuthi lokho ekwenzayo kimi kujwayelekile noma ngikubona ngendlela eyihaba”) kanye nokunye. isizathu sokuhlobanisa ukucwiliswa emanzini futhi kuhanjiswe ukuncika ngokomzwelo lapho konke ocabanga ukuthi "kuzoshintsha, okwesikhashana, kungenxa yokukhathala kwabo, ukuthi banesimilo esiningi, bangitshela ngoba banendaba..."
Mina, engikhuluma kakhulu nge-intuition enhle kakhulu, lokhu kuhlala kukhona uma okwenzekayo ngesikhathi esithile, indlela yokusondela komunye kithi, ukuziphatha komunye kithi, uma noma yini eyenzekayo ngaphakathi idala ukucasuka futhi ifika nathi ngokuphatheka kabi, kukhona intuition emsebenzini, esibeka eqinisweni lokuthi okwenzekayo akufanele kube njalo. "Umzimba ukhuluma, ngenhlanhla, wodwa, ngaphandle kokucabanga kwakho ngakho", futhi lokho kungumbono, "lowo okucabangayo noma okuzwelayo ngaphandle kwakho ngaphandle kokucabangela kwakho"
"Futhi yini evamile kumbhangqwana?" Abaningi bazobuza. Ningaxabana, nibe nezinkinga, ningakhulumisani, nicasuke bese nisuka lapho, kuphumani? ....Yebo, yebo kanye no-cha, futhi uma kukhona ukungezwani, into evamile yindlela lokhu kwehluka nezinkinga eziphakanyiswa ngayo, izimo zengqondo zenhlonipho lapho kukhulunywa ngesihloko, iphimbo elisetshenzisiwe, ukulalela ngenhloso yokuxazulula futhi. ungalaleli ngenhloso yokuvikela, uhloniphe imibono yomunye ngaphandle kokwahlulela, futhi-ke, ungadlali ukuqagela: ngokuqinisekile ukwenzela abanjalo, ngokuqinisekile ukusho ukuthi, "kuthiwani uma"... Futhi ngakho-ke kuhileleka ngokwengeziwe, ah! futhi-ke ukungakukhiphi okudlule.
Umzuzu ngamunye wezinkinga, okufanele ube mbalwa uma kuwubudlelwane obuvuthiwe futhi obunezimiso, kufanele kuhlale kukhulunywa ngabo, njalo, futhi ungakuqapheli, ujike uhambe, ukwenze ube necala futhi uyeke ukukhuluma isonto lonke? futhi hhayi luhlaza kuze kube ... ukuthengiswa kwe!!!! Ukuhoxiswa kwegama kanye nokuba khona kwalo kungenye yezijeziso ezimbi kakhulu nokuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo, njengoba kuzwakala. "Angikunaki futhi ngiphuca noma yikuphi ukufinyelela kimi ukuze ngikuxazulule, ngaphezu kokuthi "Angikuthandi", "Anginasithakazelo kunoma yini okufanele ungitshele yona."
Lobu ubudlelwano obunobuthi. Le ndlela yokuxabana ayijwayelekile (ingxoxo akufanele ibe yinto evamile, kufanele kube umbono). Imibhangqwana eminingi yajwayela ukubona emakhaya abo lezi zindlela zokusebenzelana phakathi kwabazali bazo kanye nalezi zindlela zokukhulumisana nokuphatha izingane zabo, futhi kusobala ukuthi lezi zindlela zokuziphatha zafundwa, zenziwa ngokwejwayelekile, futhi zaqala ngombhangqwana wokuqala ababenawo. . Futhi nalokhu okulandelayo. Ngaphezu kokuthatha lokhu okufundile kusukela ebuntwaneni kuya kumbhangqwana, kakade ngaphakathi kombhangqwana besizivumelanisa nezimo, sicwengisisa futhi sihlanganisa lezi zindlela zokuziphatha zokuzithoba komunye kanye nokuntuleka kwenhlonipho kanye nothando lweqiniso. Okuthile okulimazayo ukukhulela emndenini ophukile kuhlanganiswe nokuhlukunyezwa, ukuhlupheka noma ukubonwa komunye wabazali. Futhi kufana nokuba nophathina naye okuphathe kabi. Futhi ukuthi kukhona ubuqili obuningi kulokhu….. ukuthi elinye lamalungu line-psychopathology kanti elinye akazi ukuthi lingasingathwa kanjani njengenjwayelo futhi lichichima, noma ukuthi umuntu ohlukunyezwayo uphinda akhiqize lezo zimo zokuhlukumeza umlingani omusha maqondana nomunye, ngaphandle kokufana, yebo, ngaphandle uma lokhu "kuhloswe ukuba kugwenywe" ngokuhlobanisa, ukuhoxa, ukuthethelela ... ngakolunye uhlangothi lwalowo ohluphekayo futhi ongaqondi. lezi zenzo futhi uyabekezela.
Singabakhiqizi bokuhlangenwe nakho okuhle nokubi. Into embi kakhulu ayifundi, ngokwakho, ukuthuthukisa ukuziphatha kwakho ebuhlotsheni obujwayelekile, lapho okufanele okungenani kube khona futhi okuyinhloko uthando, inhlonipho nokuhlonishwa.
Kujabulisa kakhulu ukwanga ngaphandle kwesizathu, ukuqabula ngaphandle kwesizathu, ukuqabula, ukuncinza imbongolo ephaseji, ukubuka nokucwayiza, ihlaya, "umuhle" ozenzakalelayo, ukuthinta izandla, ufika ekhaya. nokufuna ukumbona , mthumelele imiyalezo ewubuwula emini, umyenge ungakulindele, khuluma ngawe, khuluma ngezinkinga ngokuhambisana nokungahlambalazi, wabelane izikhathi ngaphandle kokuzibheka, dala ukuba babe ndawonye, ufuna ukuba ndawonye , uzwe kamnandi uma unaye Ooh!!!!!!! Futhi ukuqhubekela ocansini…..into enhle kakhulu, ucansi olunothando, ngenhlonipho nangokuhleka. Ucansi akufanele lusebenze, futhi alusizi ukuxazulula noma iyiphi inkinga. Akuxazululeki lutho embhedeni kuyakhiwa kuphela, kucanjwe, kuyapakwa kuze kube ngokuzayo siphinde sibe nenye enjengale futhi futhi asikhiphe le nkinga esisanda kuyibuyisela esikhwameni sangaphambili esiqoqiwe futhi esingakaxazululwa. Hhayi-ke, silokhu siphonsa ama-kiki futhi sibone ukuthi kwenzekani…..(fatal).
Ingabe ngisebudlelwaneni obunobuthi? Hhayi-ke, ngokwalokhu obukufunda, uzozibona kanjani? Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ingabe usebudlelwaneni obujwayelekile?Ingabe ubuhlobo bokuba khona? (Nginomsebenzi omusha kanye nendlu, yeka indlela okujabulisa ngayo! Ingabe usebudlelwaneni ngaphandle kwesithakazelo? Umphatha kanjani umlingani wakho? "Umdinga" kangakanani futhi umkhumbula? Ufuna malini? ukuba naloya muntu?uba yini naye,izikhathi azinqumela zona zisele kuwe?ubani ohlale evuma?ongaxolisi...
Kwesinye isikhathi kuba nokwesaba okukhulu ekuzivumeni ukuthi akuyena lo muntu empilweni yami ngoba kusobala ukuthi akuyona into engiyifunayo futhi ngiphatheka kabi, kodwa ngezinye izikhathi sigcizelela ukuthi yebo, ukuthi i-streak embi. futhi Akunakwenzeka ukuthi lokhu akukwazi ukushintsha, futhi sinenkani futhi sihlupheka futhi akukho lutho olushintshayo, futhi ngaphezu kwalokho, sakha ukuziphatha okuzithobayo nokudlulele kakhulu kanye nezinkomba zomunye, ukufeza umgomo wethu: ukuthi sibe umbhangqwana ojabulayo, futhi akukho okunye lapho emva kwesikhathi ungajabulile noma ungenayo indlela yokuziphatha eholela kukho. Ngezinye izikhathi awushintshi ngisho nangaphansi kwengcindezi, futhi uma ushintshela "ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa okuthile", lokho kuthatha izinyanga ezimbalwa kuphela, ngoba indlela yokuba khona nokudinga akushintshi... Kancane kancane kuyabonakala ukuthi ubuyela kanjani ezindleleni zakhe zakudala futhi siphinde siqale ukuqhathanisa….uuff.
Kumbhangqwana onobuthi, omunye uya ngokuphelele ebholeni lakhe, futhi abonise lapho efuna okuthile noma lapho engenayo inketho engcono, wenza lokho akufunayo ngaphandle kokukhathalela ukuthi omunye angase acabange noma akudinge... isizathu, izaba zokubalekela noma ukukujikijela ngodoti ngaphandle kokuthi ngezinye izikhathi uhlanganise lutho nakho, ukuthi ucasuka kanjani…. Ukuqhuma kwakhe intukuthelo nokucasuka kwakhe ngezinye izikhathi kuyakwethusa futhi ngezinye izikhathi kukwenza nibhekane futhi kulapho umuntu onobuthi ephinda ethola ithuba “lokuzibeka endaweni yakho ngokuthile okukwenza uzizwe unecala….” Awunayo indlela yokuphuma, futhi uhlala lapho ngoba ungumnikazi wakho futhi ubeka kucace, ukugwema.
Kunezindlela eziningi zokuba nobuthi, kwesinye isikhathi zihlanzeke kanti ezinye zinobuqili, kuye ngobuhlakani bakho nalokho okufundile kulobu bubi obumunca imizwelo yakho futhi bunomusa ngokukhetha, okwesikhashana, "kokuthile", futhi uyaqhubeka nokukhohlisa. wena noma uzizwa njengenkosi yenkosi ngenkathi, yebo, akunjalo?
Kunzima ukukubona lokhu, ukufunda lokhu, ukukuqaphela kulokhu, kodwa ukuthi ngibhala futhi nokuthi uhlangabezane nakho akukwenzi kube ngokoqobo, ngoba uyazi ukuthi lokho ngeke kushintshe. . Yebo, uyathokoza lapho “ukholelwa” ukuthi manje yebo, ukuthi manje uNkulunkulu ukwenza uzizwe, ukuphakamisela enjabulweni enkulu, mhlawumbe, .... Noma ingabe ukungathembeki kusashushisa, ngesizathu?
Njengempilo yethu siyenza inkimbinkimbi, okuba kanye kuphela futhi ngezinye izikhathi kube nzima.
Ebudlelwaneni balezi ezinobuthi, ngokukhetha ukugcina izikhathi ezinhle kuwo wonke amarekhodi, ukudelela noma ukunciphisa ezimbi, ezikhona futhi ziningi kakhulu. Yeka ubuchopho besitha esiba nabo ngezinye izikhathi! Kodwa akasona isiphukuphuku futhi ngezinye izikhathi usishaya esihlakaleni nge-intuition nokungakhululeki, ngokusobala ... kodwa ngezinye izikhathi kuyethusa ukuphuma, "isizungu", ushintsho, uhlelo lwengqondo engilufunayo futhi ube nobudlelwano (ngisho noma buyi-shitty), kunzima kodwa, "kupholile", ikakhulukazi uma uzizwa usekelwe futhi mhlawumbe uthole "eminye imihlaba" lapho okufunayo kungenziwa futhi kwande ngo-1000. ukuthola omunye umuntu okujabulisayo, kwenza kube lula ukubona lapho ukhona futhi uphume lapho.
Ukubuyela kumlingani wakho onobuthi, uzizwa uthemba kangakanani kuye futhi kuye? ukwethembeka kwakho akusho ukuthi unayo, empeleni ukuntula inhlonipho kuningi, futhi akuhlali phambi kwakho, lapho ekhuluma ngawe kwabanye (ngemuva kwakho) edlala isisulu ngokukubekezelela noma ukukubukela phansi. , ukuzithethelela ukuthi awukho noma ungaphumi nawe ngoba unjena... futhi ubheka ezinye izinhlelo zakhe ezingezona wena kuqala, ngoba akanandaba nawe, noma ziyizinhlelo ezidingekayo futhi ongeke ube khona? .
Uma umuntu enokuzethemba okuphansi, njengoba engumuntu onobuthi, ufuna ukuziqinisa kodwa nanoma ubani... Uyakulawula, unomona, ufuna ukuziphatha kuwe noma ngabe eyakhe ihlukile kunaleyo ayifuna kuwe. Akawamukeli amacala akhe, uhamba ngokusemandleni akhe ekubhekeni izinto ezingaphandle kwakhe ngisho nakuwe. Okokuqala yizinto eziza kuqala kubo noma izinto eziza kuqala kubo kuphela, wazi ukuthi uzovuma futhi ushaye ihlombe…. futhi ngizoqhubeka nokuziphatha okuningi...
Ayilungile kanjani le ngxubevange yabantu abalungile nabantu abanobugovu. Konke kubo, kusukela kubo nangaphandle futhi kubo ... futhi ukhona nsuku zonke ukuze uqinise futhi ujabulise i-ego yabo ... ngenxa yothando lwe-pathological kanye nobubi bufika empilweni yakho, okubi kuza ngoba iningi labagulayo liyavikela. abantu kuhlanganise nayo. Abantu abanozwela nabalungile kuphela abakwazi ukubekezelela ukuba sebuhlotsheni obunobuthi bokukhohlisa okuqhubekayo, sebekuqaphela kakade. Umthetho, iBhayibheli uthi: ukuthintana nhlobo noma usathane uzoqala ukuthandela ngokushesha nje lapho umnika amandla amaqhinga.
Nginobuso obuningi nezingxoxo ekhanda lami njengamanje njengoba ngibhala, futhi labo abangifunda ngalabo abake baba nale ngxoxo - inkinga nami, bayobonwa futhi bakhunjulwe.
Bravo kulabo engibaziyo, abaningi, abaphuma lapho, bona kanye nabo…..! Ole "imihlobiso" yakho…(mamatheka). Lokho kuphila kulula kakhulu futhi kunomvuzo ngokwengeziwe ngaphandle lapho, akunjalo? Futhi uma phezu kwalokho uthola inhlansi, ngeke ngize ngikutshele…..!!!!!!!
MAYELANA NOMBHALI
Ana M. Angel Esteban
