Wolemba woyendayenda Barclays akwanitsa zaka makumi asanu ndi zisanu ndi zitatu sabata ino. Adzawakondwerera, kapena kuwakumbukira ndendende, chifukwa akhala akuwakondwerera kwa zaka zambiri tsopano, kunyumba ya amayi ake, mumzinda umene iye anabadwira. Zokhumba zake ndizosavuta, zovuta: kukumbatira amayi ake a octogenarian, kukumbatira mkazi wake ndi mwana wake wamng'ono, kudya ayisikilimu ya lucuma ngati kuti palibe mawa. Angakondenso kukumbatira ana ake aakazi akuluakulu, koma adzakhala kutali ndipo mwamwayi adzamutumizira imelo yayifupi.
Barclays akudabwa kuti ndi wokalamba. M’unyamata wake, yemwe anali kumwerekera ndi chamba ndi cocaine, zinawoneka kukhala zosatheka kukhala ndi moyo kufikira ukalamba umenewu. Akanakhoza kufa ndi mankhwala osokoneza bongo a cocaine, akanatha kuphulika mtima wake, sizinachitike. Patapita zaka zambiri, anayamba kumwa mapiritsi ogona, makamaka ogodomalitsa. Ndinkamwa mapiritsi khumi kapena khumi ndi awiri usiku wonse. Akanakhoza kufa chifukwa cha overdose, iye ankafuna kufa ndi overdose, izo sizinachitike. Barclays yayitanitsa imfa kangapo, koma sinawonekere, idayithawa, idakupatsirani mwayi wokhalamo, mwayi wanu.
Chifukwa chiyani Barclays wadzizunza mosasamala, kusewera mosasamala ndi malingaliro ake, kuyitanitsa mphamvu zoyipa, kubisalira thanzi lake moyipa? Chifukwa chiyani, mwachidule, wapeputsa moyo wake, pomwe poyang'ana koyamba anali ndi chilichonse? Kodi nchifukwa ninji mumaganiza usiku wonse kuti kukhala ndi moyo kunali ntchito yotopetsa ndi kufa ndi kupuma koyenera? Yankho lake likuwoneka losavuta: Barclays anaphunzira kudzida ali mwana, pamene atate wake anamumenya ndi kumunyoza popanda chifukwa. Kuyambira nthawi imeneyo, wakhala wolumala monga bambo ake anali wolumala, wolumala m'moyo wake monga bambo ake anali wolumala, osadzilemekeza monga bambo ake ankakhala osauka. Mwa kuyankhula kwina, Barclays anaphunzira mofulumira kupeputsa moyo wake: ichi chinali chiyambi cha kuzizira mu mtima mwake.
Momwe moyo womwewo unkawoneka ngati wopanda pake, ulendo wovuta kupita kwina kulikonse, wopusa, kusamvetsetsana, Barclays adakakamira mwambo wabwino womwe mwina unapulumutsa moyo wake: kuthawa kuzovuta zenizeni, kuzizira komwe kuli mumtima mwake, kuthamangitsa zopeka. Ali mwana, ankakhulupirira kwambiri nthano zachipembedzo zomwe amayi ake ankamuphunzitsa, ndipo chifukwa cha iye anali mwana wopembedza, wodzipereka, pafupifupi mnyamata wa guwa. Ndithudi, iye anapanga mgonero woyamba. Koma ali wachinyamata, atavutika ndi chilakolako chogonana, anasiya kukhulupirira nthano zachipembedzo ndipo anakana kutsimikizira m’chipembedzo cha Katolika kuti anabatizidwa. Posakhulupirira zopeka zachipembedzo, anathaŵira ku zopeka zina zomwe zinkawoneka kwa iye zabwinoko, zodalirika, zodalirika, zokhutiritsa, zokongola kwambiri, zolemera: zopeka zolembalemba, zopeka zaluso. Poyamba anali wowerenga, kenako wolemba. Poyamba adapita kumasewera a kanema, kenako pakompyuta. Poyamba anali mtolankhani wolemedwa ndi kulemera kwakukulu kwa choonadi, ndiyeno wolemba.
Sikokokomeza kunena kuti Barclays akukwanitsa zaka makumi asanu ndi zisanu ndi zitatu chifukwa chakuti adapereka moyo wake wonse, moyo wake wonse, mutu wake, mtima wake, matumbo ake, viscera yake, kulemba yekha. . Akadakhala kuti sanali mlembi, akadapanda kusindikiza mabuku khumi ndi asanu, akanakhala atafadi: mabuku amene anaŵerenga ndi kulemba mwina anapulumutsa moyo wake, chinyengo cha kulemba bukhu latsopano chinapereka tanthauzo ku kukhalapo kwake, kulikometsera, kulilemeretsa. . Nzosadabwitsa kuti Barclays adzakhala akupereka buku m'masabata angapo. Iye sadziwa ngati kudzakhala bwino kapena kulephera, ngati kudzakhala ndi owerenga ambiri kapena ochepa, ngati kutsutsa kudzakhala kokoma mtima kapena konyansa, koma maonekedwe pafupifupi mozizwitsa a bukuli, lotchedwa "Los genios", lofalitsidwa ndi Wofalitsa wotchuka wachisipanishi Galaxia Gutenberg ku Spain ndi America, amachulukitsa chidwi chake ndikumupatsanso chinyengo chofanana ndi chomwe adamva pamene adasindikiza buku lake loyamba zaka makumi atatu zapitazo.
Barclays sadzalankhula za izi ndi amayi ake patsiku lake lobadwa, chifukwa samawerenga mabuku a mwana wake, samazindikira kapena kuzindikira malo aluso a mwana wake, kotero kuti, pamaso pa amayi ake a octogenarian, Barclays ndi wolemba mobisa , mu chipinda. Kodi Barclays ndi amayi ake azikambilana zotani lamulungu lachilimwe lija mumzinda momwe anabadwira onse? Ndizosakayikitsa kuti adzalankhula za ndale, zankhani zapoizoni za ndale zamtundu, zamudzi, ndipo malingaliro ake adzakhala aakulu, onyansa, opanda pake: iye ndi mkazi wachipembedzo chamanja, amadana ndi achinyengo akumanzere ndi masomphenya ake. wa ndale wodzazidwa ndi chikhumbo chakuya cha chiyero cha makhalidwe, ku makhalidwe abwino. Ndizosakayikitsa kuti, nthawi yomweyo, Barclays idzayesa kupeŵa nkhani zapoizoni za ndale, koma zidzalephera ndipo pamapeto pake zidzakokedwa mumatope, m'matope amenewo. Chifukwa chomwe Mayi Barclays angafune ndi chakuti mwana wawo akhale wandale, osati wolemba. Koma amatsutsa mouma khosi nyimbo za siren zija ndipo amaganiza kuti ngati wolemba alowa ndale zaukatswiri, walephera, wasiya kukhala wojambula, waponya thaulo kufunafuna kukongola kosatha. Chifukwa mu ndale simudzapeza luso kapena kukongola, mumangopeza nkhanza ndi zoipa, masautso ndi kunyansidwa, zolakwa ndi zachinyengo. Iye nthawizonse amataya ndale, iye akuganiza.
Ali ndi zaka makumi asanu ndi zisanu ndi zitatu, ndikupempha mlongo wake womwalirayo kuti amuteteze ku zoipa zoipitsitsa, Barclays sakupezanso zifukwa zopitirizira kuyitanitsa imfa, kuti apitirize kuwononga moyo wake. Tsopano iye ndi munthu wokondwa, osati chifukwa chakuti ndi wonenepa amakhala wosasangalala, osati chifukwa chakuti amapewa masewera sakhala wosangalala, osati chifukwa chakuti amamwa mapiritsi atatu ochititsa munthu kusinthasintha maganizo ndiye kuti sakusangalala kwenikweni. M’mawu ena, Barclays amasangalala chifukwa ndi wonenepa, samasewera, komanso amamwa mapiritsi atatu kuti athe kuwongolera matenda ake ochititsa munthu kusinthasintha maganizo. Koma makamaka amasangalala chifukwa ali m’malo amene wasankha limodzi ndi anthu amene wawasankha. Wafika pachilumbachi m’paradaiso, kapena kuti amakhulupiriradi, tsiku lililonse la moyo wake wodalitsika. Amakonda mkazi wake yemwe ndi wamng'ono kwambiri kuposa iye, amakonda ana ake aakazi atatu, amakonda kuona mwana wake wamkazi wamng'ono tsiku ndi tsiku, amakonda nyumba yake, malo ake oyandikana nawo, chizolowezi chake, amakonda moyo wodekha komanso wodziŵika bwino umene amakhala nawo, amakonda. maola omwe amathera polemba, amakonda kugona pabedi m'bandakucha ndikutsegula buku losamalizidwa lomwe kuwerenga kwake kumamupangitsa kuyenda, paulendo, osachoka kunyumba. Barclays ndiye adakonda moyo wake chifukwa umawoneka ngati moyo wongopeka, moyo wa munthu wolemba mabuku, munthu yemwe amakhala patchuthi nthawi zonse kapena woyendayenda, munthu yemwe saopa imfa, yemwe amakumbukira bwino, yemwe akakhala ndi moyo. kuti atenge chisankho chofunikira, mwachitsanzo, ngati akuyenda kapena kuti asawononge tsiku lake lobadwa ndi amayi ake, amadabwa zomwe ayenera kuchita ngati chaka chomaliza cha moyo wake, ndiyeno yankho ndilosavuta: amayenda, ndithudi. amayenda kukumbatira amayi ake tsopano akudya ayisikilimu ya lucuma
Monga inu ndinu agnostic, pamene inu mukuona kuti kuvomereza kukaikira ndi kulola kuti kukula ndi chizindikiro cha luntha ndi mphamvu, Barclays samatsutsa kotheratu kuti mapemphero a amayi ake, kapena a mlongo wake womwalirayo yemwe anali sisitere ndi wolemba ndakatulo, wapulumutsa moyo wake kuchokera ku cocaine kapena hypnotic overdose, sakuletsa kuti milungu ndi oyera mtima ndi angelo, ngati izi zilipo, adapanga chiwembu chotalikitsa moyo wake motalikirapo. N’chifukwa chake amapemphera komanso sali wokhulupirira, ngakhale kuti amalankhula ndi mlongo wakeyo n’kumaona kuti aliko. Tsopano Barclays sakuthamangira kuchoka, kumenyetsa chitseko, lolani chinsalu chigwe. Iye ali wofulumira, inde, kulemba mabuku ambiri, kuwerenga mabuku ambiri, kuwonera mafilimu ambiri, kuyenda maulendo ambiri ndi banja. Iye akufulumira kupeza kukongola mu luso, osati m'dziko la mphamvu, ndalama, ndi ndale. Iye ali wofulumira kukonda mkazi wake monga okonda amakondana pa chisumbu cha paradaiso: osati ndi mawu, ndi kupsopsona. Iye ali mofulumira, pakali pano, pamene akupita ku Madrid ndi Barcelona kukapereka buku lakuti "Los genios", lomwe, akumva, ndilo lofuna kwambiri pa ntchito yake.
Barclays anawona modabwa kuti anali kutembenuza zaka makumi asanu ndi zisanu ndi zitatu zakubadwa, pamene ankakonda kunena kuti, wolemba wotembereredwa, wojambula wosamvetsetseka, kuti sakanakwanitsa zaka makumi asanu. Tsopano zikuwoneka zosaneneka kwa iye, pafupifupi wosalimba, wamwano, kuti angakhale ndi moyo zaka makumi asanu ndi atatu. Zingakhale zamulungu kuzipanga mpaka makumi asanu ndi awiri, akuganiza mozama. Ndatsala ndi zaka khumi ndi ziwiri kuti ndilembe mabuku ena atatu, amadzilonjeza okha. Ndi mwayi waukulu, ndatsala zaka khumi ndi ziwiri kuti ndikhale ndi moyo ndipo ndikufuna kukhala nawo ndi banja ili, m'nyumba ino, pa chisumbu cha paradaiso, kuwerenga ndi kulemba. Ndikachotsedwa ntchito pawailesi yakanema, ngati zaka khumi ndi ziwiri zikubwerazi sindichitanso pulogalamu yapa kanema wawayilesi, zimasemphana ndi momwe kukhumudwitsidwa kumeneku kumandipangira kukhala wolemba komanso munthu wosangalala: ziyenera kukhala zotheka, Barclays amadziuza yekha, mwadzidzidzi, Ndani ankadziwa, chiyembekezo, mwadzidzidzi ofunda mtima.
